Quintessa Touche

What's your preferred name?

Quintessa Touche

What are your pronouns?

She Her

Share with us how you identify and how you came to that understanding of yourself.

[Gender] Fluid. As a dad, my oldest child wanted to do drag as an art form as a teenager, and I wanted to make sure they were safe, so I decided to do it with them, with the goal of finding safe spaces that we could do age-appropriate shows until they were an adult. I fell in love with the community and the art.

Tell us about how your self-expression has helped you grow.

Drag is like my mask and cape — something I put on to show up for others. It gives me a unique perspective on the scene, allowing me to help parents of queer kids understand how to love their children unconditionally. I bring Black representation to the stage, and I’m here to help you smile when the world feels a little too heavy.

Where did you grow up? What was a formative experience you had in childhood that led you to where you are today?

I grew up in Philadelphia, then joined the Military and traveled the world for many years. I was stationed in Washington and never left. I fell in love with the fresh air, snowboarding, and open-minded people.

What is a life goal that you are working on or have achieved? How has working toward this goal helped you understand yourself as an individual?

My main goal in life was to raise my children to be good human beings and model what it takes to be self-sufficient. I also always wanted to find some joy in my experiences. I think I get to achieve these every day.

Who is someone who inspired you to be your true self? What was their influence on you?

I have a few; my wife has supported this journey for me and our kiddo, my child for allowing me to walk beside them on the path of art, Betty Desire the first drag artist I went to see in Bellingham WA, Vivienne Paradisco being my first Drag Mentor and inspiration, And Gina Touche for welcoming me into their house of love and provide me and my kid the very first spaces to explore the art of drag and showing me how to produce shows, network with the community.

What's something that you worry about?

I worry about people who live just to survive; they miss out on the small joys. Every day isn't always full of joy, but we can find ways to recognize that we all have value and grow. I feel we look too much at the storm and miss the rainbows.

What gives you hope?

ME. I give me hope when I can let a conservative guy come up to me and tell me I changed his mind on what drag queens were. I get hope when I'm able to share information that can help someone out of a gloomy situation.

If you had a message for your younger self, what would you say?

Live for the now, Plan for the future. You don't need to compete with anyone; just be your best self, be kind to as many people as will let you, and let the universe and karma win your battles and wish people the day they deserve.

What's a piece of wisdom you've learned that has helped you?

Put your energy and time in spaces that want you there, not just need you there. You don't owe anyone anything, so when you give, give in love and truth.

What is something you wish other people would know or understand?

At the end of the day, we all want similar things: love, joy, and respect. And when you try to give someone you don't understand your grace, remember, they may be one decision away from changing for the better.